The mere-exposure effect, established by psychologist Robert Zajonc, is the tendency to like people and things more simply because we've been exposed to them repeatedly. For building connection, that means consistency beats intensity: showing up regularly, even briefly, makes you more likable over time, no grand gesture required.
Familiarity is its own kind of charm
In a series of experiments in the 1960s, Zajonc showed people unfamiliar faces, words, and symbols varying numbers of times. The more often someone saw a given stimulus, the more they reported liking it. Repetition alone, with nothing else added, increased preference.
The practical version
This is why the regular gym nod, the repeated hello to the same barista, or simply being around the same group week after week quietly builds warmth. You do not need to be impressive on day one. You need to keep showing up, which lowers the stakes of any single interaction enormously.
The catch is that you have to actually be in the room. The reps that build familiarity are the small, repeated, low-pressure ones, exactly the kind that are easiest to rehearse until starting them feels automatic.